Milpitas North San Jose Berryessa Real Estate News

Clearly not trying to offend anybody, but I am a bit upset after hearing some random unrelated events. 

 

Today, I read a title "AshleyMadison, the website for married cheaters, notes record increases in mothers signing up for its services the Monday after Mother's Day".  Although not endorsing mothers having affairs, I kind of understand them.  I didn't have a super good mother's day and am still trying to shake the aftermath of the unpleasant feelings.  Last night, a girl friend told me that on Mother's day she had to sit in her car in an empty parking lot for hours after preparing dinner for her family in the effort of releasing some negative pressure.

 

The mothers work around the clock to take care of the family without anybody saying "thank you" to them.  For the one day, the special day that's designed for everybody in the family to say thanks to the moms, they expect a lot.  That's the root cause of the huge disappointment.  Mothers expect something from someone to some how make all her resentments and underappreciation go away, sort of like of the kiss on the booboo.  In reality, most of the things we get are some meaningless and effortless flowers, phone calls, dinners, and lunches.  They are meaningless to the mothers because they are effortless.

 

To the millions of dads and kids, the mother's day is just another day that they need to squeeze in more work in their already busy schedule.  It's trouble and inconvenience to them.  That's why even when they do "delivered" all the nice things they are suppose to deliver, they do it with a bit of resentment and a bit of reluctance.

 

Mothers, before they become mothers, were women.  All women, like beautiful flowers, need to be loved and nurtured so they can continue to be beautiful.  It's not a hard thing for the mothers to sense the tiny resentment and reluctance.  When they do, they relate that to the year-round neglect from the dads and quickly reached a conclusion that they are not loved any more.

 

Of course they sign up for affairs.  But my poor sisters, if you are hoping for love and attention from the affairs, you are setting yourself up for bigger disappointment.  My heart really goes out to those women who feel neglected by the men in their lives.  I hope they can realize that mothers, by definition, mean underappreciation. 

 

The sooner we learn to accept that, the sooner we will be happier.  I don't want to pretend to have all the answers, when I am still struggling myself.  But I do know the expectation from the husbands are unrealistic.  Coincidentally, our ex governor just announced his separation from his wife.  Not knowing the details, I can't really say much.  I am saddened by the fact that they decided to call it a quit after 25 years of marriage.  What are the reasons preventing them to enjoy their life and family together after so many years?  I can't help but guessing unrealistic expectations play a big role......


Posted by May Lee on May 10th, 2011 10:00 AMPost a Comment (0)

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